The part of the endless sadness, loneliness and "depression" is that you are actually realizing things. you can feel numb but also you are slowly dying inside because
everytime it comes back to you
you realize one more thing about yourself
how strange you have to look to others when you cant simply just talk to people sometimes
you cant just do what they do because its tearing you apart
as much as its tearing you that you are disable to work like any other even though you could in the past
and you started asking yourself if is there a chance to be that person again
that happy person
that person who does not worry
everyday
every hour
about everything
and sometimes you just find your thoughts are so dark that even if there will be a person you want to tell about it
you just cant
because you know that it will be true immediately
and nothing in this world will get it out of your mind
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